My Field Trip to the Church of Scientology

When you have 5 days in Los Angeles, I’m sure that the top of your bucket list is to go to the church of Scientology. No? Honestly, not on mine either. But when you pass by on a hot Saturday afternoon and there’s air conditioning and seats, it’s pretty appealing. 

And that’s exactly how I found myself in the church of Scientology in the middle of Hollywood on a beautiful Saturday afternoon. 

I did not expect that my vacation to Los Angeles  would include a trip to the church of scientology, but there i sat on a saturday afternoon in a scientology building along Hollywood blvd. I’m not sure if they considered it a church or a store or what, but that wasn’t one of the pressing questions i was ready to ask. 

So my friend and I wandered in and pretended to be very interested in the program, and we were invited to watch a video. Just 3 minutes, she said, and we could do the auditing demonstration. So we sat down and I stared at the floor while my friend watched the video on auditing. When the video ended, we were invited to try the auditing device. Then, my inner journalist came out. 

I asked if the auditors of scientology had experience in psychology. She said “no, because psychology isn’t real”. I tried to control my facial expressions.She said, “nothing about psychology is based on hard facts (what) and none of it has worked or been supported (but scientology does). A philosophy background? “No”, she smiled. So i ask where the concepts come from and how they created the methods. She starts to talk about the founder and how awesome he is. 

Moving on from the fact this woman just said psychology and neuroscience wasn’t real, I started to ask about the auditing device. Question 1: What is this measuring? Heart rate? Heat? ‘Thought’. She told us that thoughts had a physical weight to them and this device measured the weight in terms of gravity. Whatever. Npw, my favorite question. I asked how  the actual device works to detect these thoughts. My first guess was megahertz. Her response when I asked was “sure”. That’s all. No more words, no explanation. The funnier part was my non-science friends asked if I made the unit of measurement up, which I totally should have. 

Anyways, after my friend didn’t explode from trying this weird device that measures nothing, I agreed to try it.The meter that measures the “thoughts’ moved, and I stupidly mentioned my loved one in rehab. Next, she asked me if I knew what narcanon was. Naive moment #2, I said yes, thinking it was like AlAnon (AA for family members”. Then she told me all about  Narcanon how it really works. We watched another video and she told me about ho the program (scientology’s rehab) was the most successful (still not based in anything from biology, chemistry, religion or actually real). They believe that everyone has toxic contents that are harming their brain and keeping them from being at peace, so everyone has to go through a detox. All meducations, water treatments, pollutants, cleaners, etc are not allowed and everyone must be cleansed from these toxins. She didn’t really have anything to say when I asked about people who require medications to keep them alive, so I guess they don’t believe those actually work anyways. 

I never thought much of it after our trip. It was just one of the many weird adventures we did. Then, a few weeks after my trip, I came across this article. A former patient of a Narcanon program shared her story about the program and the dangers of scientology. The practices of scientology not being connected to any formal training, licenses or protocols carries over into their Narcanon program. The program has not had research done, the staff members don’t have training or experience and for something as serious as drug withdrawal, it should be considered an illegal and dangerous practice. Check out her article here. 

So, if you find yourself in LA for a weekend, check out the church of Scientology for a fun time.